While your mind is in quite a preoccupied space when you’re getting it on with someone, many women can’t help but worry about their tummies being trim, their boobs looking perky and their makeup not smudging all over the place. But it turns out these irrational insecurities are not just reserved for the ladies – men also get a little nervous when it comes to sex and the, er, specifications, of their nether-regions.
Men’s Health reported that the two most common questions they receive from readers about matters of the sexual kind were A) whether penis enlargement products actually work and B) how to last longer in bed. This reveals that men seem to be rather self-conscious about their size and endurance, despite the fact that women really don’t see these factors as the most important things related to good sex.
The online magazine surveyed a group of women recently and posed the open-ended question of what they really want in bed, and found that not one of them mentioned penis size or time spent doing the dirty.
And to back that up, another poll done recently for Pure Romance (a sex toy company), sought to find out what it was that women are really looking for in a sexual partner. They surveyed 1,000 married men and women, offering them a range of sexual scenarios to choose from, which they think would improve their marriage. And – spoiler alert – no-one picked “a bigger penis”.
So what was it that women find the biggest turn on? These five answers were the clear favourites.
1. A little more conversation
Yep, 62 per cent of women said that simply being able to speak openly, honestly and often about sex (and other G-rated topics) would help improve their marriage. Men agreed, with about half of the male participants also saying better communication would strengthen their bond.
2. More foreplay
Here’s one we’ve heard over and over… yet it’s still something that women need to ask for more of (58 per cent of this study, to be precise). C’mon people, there’s more to sex than just intercourse, and if she doesn’t think the size of your penis matters that much, then it goes to show that it’s not just penetration she’s interested in.
3. Adding some sex toys into the mix
A happy coincidence for a survey conducted by a sex toy company? Maybe, but results showed that 40 per cent of women think sex toys could really spice things up in the bedroom with their partner.
4. Playing out a fantasy
Declaring what fantasy or fetish has been on your mind lately, and going ahead and acting one out (or even just teasing out the possibility) was something that 40 per cent of women said would make their sex so much better. 50 per cent of men were also tempted by this idea.
An extension of the previous point, it turns out that 35 per cent of women want for you to take on different personas and act out a sexy situation as if you were different people, taking on different roles.
Well, looks like could be better off in the bedroom by not being so self-conscious about the size of your package, and rather focusing on heating things up with something fun and different, and not skimping on the foreplay. Just remember golden rule number one, and don’t forget to talk about it.